Spirituality is how people deal with pain and suffering. On a deep and wide basis the issue of human Pain and Suffering are endemic to what we are as humans. No one escapes Pain&Suffering. Pain/Suffering causes us to reflect, to wonder, to ask, “why me?,” or “what did I do to deserve this?” Or “why is life so threatening and awful some times?”

This includes the practical and often difficult issues of having food, shelter and clothing so we may survive and thrive, have a family and a community that we love, respect and protect.

But more Pain leads to the emotional and psychological, the personal and the philosophical question of WHAT DO I DO WITH MY PAIN? HOW DO I PROCESS IT? IN REAL TERMS? Do I look outward to attribute pain’s origin and source on some outside force, the gods of weather, storm and mountaintops and lightning? Society, government, history?

Or do I look inward and ask, “did I cause this pain somehow,” “am I responsible for making this pain happen by something I did or did not do?” “Do I blame others or hold myself responsible?” “Do I lash out or do I find ways to avoid certain situations?” “What, what, what.. do I do?”

Pain raises conscience and morality, our ultimate sense of right and wrong, good and evil, meaning or meaninglessness. That is what makes us “spiritual” creatures. Our “Spirituality” is defined by our deep responses to pain – the options.. to escape it, ameliorate it, redeem it or convert it.. or what? Cope or heal? Our “religion” is the form our answers take to Pain. There are good and bad answers to the question of Pain and what to do with it.

Emotionally pain and suffering, when it is persistent in our thoughts and feelings, begs for a solution. Its symptoms can be many.. anxiety, depression, physical maladies, lack of control, over-controlling, habits we sense are destructive to our relationship with others and ourselves.

Pain seeks relief, a “stop!,” a resolution that replaces what was with a happiness or a satisfaction that now is. Pain begs for peace and calm to replace its nagging and doubt. Pain demands honesty in reflection.. with ourselves and with others. But pain itself obscures things; it confuses matters; it can hide under the mask of “this is tolerable” if we know nothing else. Too often pain begins in childhood but it can occur in any event at any stage of life. Pain can make honesty difficult even with reflection.

Often in our pain we turn to others for clarity, empathy, understand, support or advice. All these are good coping mechanisms. Coaching and therapy go beyond mere ‘coping.’ Coaching exposes pains’ roots, appearance, and voice in order to eliminate that source, that cause, .. and just as importantly REPLACE THE PAIN with happiness, gratitude, new boundaries and new will power to make life conform to our plans, wishes, dreams and wishes.. in love with ourselves and others near to us.